Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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