Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize