you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
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