If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
