Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
