I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
