I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Randomize