two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
