You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Randomize