Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Are we still banned from the library?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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