1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
