i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Randomize
