Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
