Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry it_is_what_it_is hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....

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(716): View more from New York

He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."

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(734): View more from Michigan

I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.

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(248): View more from Michigan

On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult

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(661): View more from California

Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.

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(408): View more from California

Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.

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(518): View more from New York

Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?

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(580): View more from Oklahoma

I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.

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