I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
