Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
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