She is in my trunk
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize
