I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Randomize
