yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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