we have officially lost it.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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