I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
