everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
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