Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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