If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
