it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Randomize