You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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