hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
