If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
