idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
