i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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