I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
