Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
