God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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