If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Randomize
