well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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