He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
