A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
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