you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
