My room smells like vodka and shame
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
