Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
