i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
