Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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