remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize