Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
