I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
