it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
