Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
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