My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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