I wannas sexs uuuuu
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
