I heard we made out
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize
