Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Randomize
