me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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