I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
